Marriage is much more complex than I thought some 30 years ago. The vows we take are shrouded usually in a pre-wedded bliss where the immensity of the commitment your about to take can not be truly realized.
When your young, or even not so young and the minister says, “For richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do you part” I think we hear “for richer in health we shall never part”.
Marriage is a lot of work, and it’s rewards for those who understand that fact, can not be measured. My basis for marriage centers around a word which I use interchangeably with the word love, that word is commitment. I believe this word more aptly describes this union between a man and a woman. Love often is said and /or felt from the seat of our emotions and is the word we most often will use to convey the intensity of our feelings towards another. Commitment is the action behind those words which I think is the basis for 1 Cor. 13. In fact I have read this chapter replacing the word love with the word commitment. I would even be so bold as to use this interchangeably throughout the bible.
That statement may raise the hackles on some, as it seems to somehow add a sense of practicality to love that many may not be comfortable with. After 25 years of marriage I am more committed than ever to our relationship, it has been a tremendous blessing in my life and I can never thank God sufficiently for this incredible helpmate I call my wife.
It seems commitment in our society has been severely lacking as we are continuously bombarded with messages that it’s better to divorce than be unhappy, or why bother getting married at all… why not just live together after all it’s just a piece of paper, and a number of other messages justifying non-committal.
This is a huge topic and one that will not be addressed simply in a blog post, but one nonetheless worthy of discussion.
I would prefer making this an inclusive discussion that incorporates both people of faith and others if for no other reason than it seems whether you are of some spiritual persuasion or not the statistics are eerily similar in regards to longevity in a marriage.
When someone says commitment what do you think of and how do you define it in your relationships?